Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Some Truth.....

Here's the deal.  I was thisclose to not posting anymore.  I was discouraged and not really willing to give this my time.  Then a friend wrote and told me she was enjoying it, so I decided to keep going.  I have been supposed to write for quite a few days, but the truth is.....I really haven't felt like it.  These past few days have beed a bit rough on our little family of six.  Sometime being the mother of a 2,4,6,and 8 year old, the wife of a great man, a daughter, a friend, a sister, the owner of a small business, the coordinator of the preschool calender at church, the teacher of an elementary school (our homeschool), a soccer mom, a cub scout mom and last but not least a sinner, is just plain exhausting.  Sometimes I want to throw in the towel and QUIT.  The past two days have for sure been that way.  There have been times that I didn't want to be a mom, daughter, teacher, wife, a working momma, a coordinator or a friend.  I am just plain tired.  And at the end of the day I go to bed thinking about ALL the things I didn't get done.

I know none of you have EVER been there or even come close to understanding what I am talking about.   But for the moment, maybe you could pretend.  Sometimes I don't think it can all get done.  Most days it doesn't, but somehow every.single.day the kids get fed, the dishes gets done and they all (make that WE all) learn something.

I can't tell you how *I* juggle all that I do.  Because the truth is *I* can't.  I can NOT do it all.  I can't even come close.  Actually, I feel sure that it were left up to me, NONE of it would get done.  Thankfully though God cares.  He cares about ALL the details of my life.  He cares about the food  I feed my kids, He cares about the things I teach them,  He cares about the goals I have set in my business, He cares about the tears I cry in frustration when I can't get it all done.  And all He asks from me is for me to give it to Him.  He wants to be in control.  He wants to manage my schedule and HE is the only one who can.

I know this because there have been times in the recent past where He has told me something was too much for me to do, and that I had to stop.  I have stepped down from ministry positions that I LOVED because God wanted me to do something else.  I have agreed to do things that I really didn't want to because I know that God wants me to.   And so long as I continue to surrender to Him EVERYTHING I have, He will get it all done.  The funny thing is, that sometimes the things I think need to be done, don't need to be done at all!!  The other thing is some things get done that I never thought needed to be done, but in the end, I see that it really was His plan.  He cares.  He cares about the broken screen on the LeapPad2, He cares about my tears, He cares about the camera-that my Hubby and I don't agree on and He gives the tech support lady grace to respond just the way I need so that when she says, we'll fix it, I know that ONLY GOD could have made that happen.  Because He is the only one who can care for the things big and small in my life that make or break each day.

He cares SO much so that He sent His precious, sinless son to die on a cross for my sin.  For your sin.  And because He cares that much for me, it is the least I can do to submit to my hubby's decision about the camera, to forgive those who have offended me, to beg my kids for forgiveness when mommy lost it yet again, and to surrender my life, ALL of my life, to Him.

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